One Way United

I had an epiphany while I was driving home from practice this evening. It was about control. More specifically, it was about the true essence of the phrase “being in control.” I have been a swim coach for two years now and the worst parts of being a coach is when you feel “out of control.” Sometimes, no matter how many times you tell a kid to do something, they just won’t do it. There are times as I’m addressing the group in practice when kids will start talking to their friends, a clear sign of disrespect. There are times kids are constantly doing what they are told NOT to do. In all those cases, I perceive myself as being “out of control.” I remember my first year coaching when I consistently had nightmares where all the kids were doing their own thing and nobody was listening to me.

Anyway, most of what I just stated is complete and utter crap because I was never in control to begin with!  When it comes to other human beings, I have absolutely NO CONTROL over them. I never have. I never will. God gave every person free will and we are all free to choose how we act, how we think, and what we do. Control, when it pertains to others, is an illusion.

So I have to redefine what it means to be “in control” and “out of control.” There is only one person in this world that I have complete control over. So, my focus should always be on keeping control of MYSELF. Being “in control” means that, regardless of the changing circumstances or situations, I can choose to not let those things control ME. As soon as I let my own behavior or thought processes become affected by a source not from within, I have lost control.

This is all not to say I haven’t thought or considered all this before. It’s just that sometimes these waves of wisdom descend on me out of nowhere and then familiar concepts all of a sudden become intimate ways to relate to the world. It’s like having a knowledge of how something works and then having an “aha!” moment where you gain a great understanding of it in one instant. God seems to do this a lot with me. It’s hard to explain.

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I never go into a swim practice without having a specific workout planned out for that day.  What we do depends on many factors such as: the time in the season, work done in previous workouts that week, what I feel my swimmers need to improve on, etc.  Today I walked into practice and a couple of my swimmers begged me to do 20 x 100s @ 1:30 (20 times through 100 yards beginning every minute and thirty seconds).  This also happens to be the test set in which swimmers need to pass in order to move on to the next level on the team.  Now, I didn’t plan a very aerobic workout.  My plan was to do more drills to clean up strokes with the longest set only being 800 yards or so.  But when kids beg you to work hard (this doesn’t happen very often, believe it or not), it’s hard to say no.  The right mix of kids were there to do it so I had everybody in my group attempt the grueling set.  And I was shocked at how well everybody did.  Everybody made more of the 100s than I thought they would.  They were cheering each other on, congratulating each other, and they all worked their tail off.  It was beautiful.  Now, we didn’t do one thing in my original workout plan and it turned into one of the best practices of the year.  Everybody left feeling good about themselves and motivated to do better next time.  Man, I love coaching!

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So, for somebody that has just one part time job and lives at home, you wouldn’t think I’d be that busy.  But this week has been 24/7 of doing something productive.  I’m one that usually just likes to relax every once in a while…but alas, not this week.  I’ve been coaching more than ever during the week as my mentor and fellow coach has been out after having hip replacement surgery.  I’ve also had to write a paragraph for over 60 different kids that I coach!  Don’t get me wrong, I love writing about how great each one of my little swimmers are but after the one billionth time of writing “she’s/he’s got a great work ethic…has a good attitude…listens very well…has improved a lot,” it begins to drive you a bit crazy as you think about something creative and original to say.  Coupled in with doing private lessons, preparing for MY swim meet this weekend, writing a resume, applying for a job, and doing taxes, it begins to wear on you.

Last night I didn’t get home until 10:30 from work because I was stuck for over an hour on 520!  Usually I’m pretty patient with traffic but when it’s 10:00, driving home from work, and you haven’t had dinner yet…lets just say I called a few people for their pity!   Then I got home, ate dinner, did taxes, and wasn’t able to go to bed until 1.  Now Friday is here, generally my more busy day.  Anyway, it’s fun to complain.  I should do it more often.  Even if all my complaining entails is writing in a blog that nobody reads!  haha.

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